June 23, 2011

Back Into Gypsy Princess Mode

Now I am being uprooted. Changes of the unknown kind grow rampant and unchecked in my garden. A great unbidden fickle hand is swooping in to pull my gentle weedy friends and trim my hedge, leaving me exposed and without shelter . Leave me some fragrant flowers and healing herbs please, wild unknowable future. Pot up a little bowl of parsley and thyme to roll out the door with me. Guide me to verdant and solid ground, where my roots can finally spread and bear the fruits of my labor, not to be uprooted for a long long while. Let me plant again, spreading in comfort and security my wild herbs and flowers, my hedge of many colors, my salad and turnips and radish. Give me a home where the pixies roam and the skies can be cloudy if they want to be.

of these things I have not spoken, altho it is what is happening in my life. but it does not define me or confine me or delay my movement into further realms of contributing to a better world, as best I can..


June 22, 2011

Longing for 75º Fahrenheit

I do not want to miss a minute of the warm weather, not one single precious minute. The air on my bare arms finally is not raising goosebumps of chill. The air so kindly is wafting to my eager nose smells of the biggest umbel flowers blooming at the edge of the hedge.
One thing you may not know about me is that I gave birth to my first daughter in a tent under the trees near the river in hot July sunny shine 32 years ago. It was a beautiful time to camp and enjoy nature and live freely and wildly. I was accompanied by fine wise midwives and attendant birds singing in the trees. It was a good day.
All 4 of my kids were born at home. I will tell you about that sometime.
We had a rather large tent with a fine place to pitch it. It began my love affair with having walls of canvas as opposed to brick or wood. I will tell you of my days living in a tepee sometime.
I love being outside all day and watching the changes of nature's rhythm as it flows. I love when the first star twinkles in the dusk (make a wish!) and the moon comes over the horizon. I love the comfort that the new day's sun brings as I snuggle back down into blankets for a few more minutes of sleep. I loved gathering wood for the campfire and fetching water and a delicious cup of coffee, the reward for my efforts as I smiled.
This long, seemingly 2 years of wet cool springing weather has kept me inside way more than I would prefer and made me glad to have those wooden walls to keep me dry. Now my heart sings and soars to the outside wide sky and whispery winds and nighthawks cry.
... Well, it WAS nice yesterday, the eve of summer's debut. Today, already, the heat of the inland valleys has kept the cool marine air hugging the coast, not dissipating and blowing away, alas. So, ha, the sweater is back on my chilled arms and I write of warm dreams and memories.
I know much of our nation is very very hot now, some with too much moisture and some with almost none. The Pacific Northwest has both coolness and moisture. This spring has gone on the record books as extra cool and extra wet, as was last year. I don't think it has even reached 64ºF yet all year. So although I appreciate this moderate and verdant weather, I do long for real true summery shining sky and warmth. I think nothing rejuvenates the spirit and brings out our childlike heart as much as summer does.
as a young lass, Summer dreamed of the day she would fill the sky with warmth and glowing light, making everyone smile and frolic

June 16, 2011

Brew Me a Cup of Bravery Please

borage
Herbal Wisdom
The kingly basilikon must be reviled,
Spit upon, abused for abundance
Tho admixed with goose grease so good
For babies' ears and aphrodisiacs.
"Ego, Borago, gaudia semper ago."
The oxtongue's liquid quiets
A wildman but combined with wine
One howls and pines. "I,
Borage, always gives courage."
Who said character is fate?
I should like to sate
Myself with sage and thyme.
  Martine Bellen
  The Vulnerability of Order

June 11, 2011

Sky Pilots

The sight of canada geese flying overhead is one of my favorite things. I love to hear their squawking and honking and run outside to look for them in the sky. It is really magical to hear them at night but not be able to see them but know they are flying in formation right above me. I know they can be rambunctious when you get close to them in the field - I have been chased many times!
I have noticed when they fly south they favor the V formation and when going north seem to be in the long single diagonal. Does seem they are going north a bit later than usual this year? Anyone else seeing them?
fly by
The sound of the geese stirs my true gypsy soul and awakens my innate preference for wide movement on the face of the earth. I grew up traveling and loved it. Lately not so much traveling. Well I had better make an effort to change that alrighty!
Actually I have developed a strange fear of steep roads, roads that have a steep incline up or down. Going fast down roads curving downhill. Steepaphobia. Going uphill and stopping, feeling like I may roll back. Rollaphobia. I know it's sick and unfounded! I have been around the world on steep roads. This has only developed after some nightmares of riding down some very very steep roads with my grandfather, whom I liked travelling with and other nebulous reasons. Maybe it is some kind of cosmic karmic gravity thing. Fear of flying (not a nod to Erica Jong there) - flying right off the face of the earth!
So this fear seems to limit me too much for my ideal version of self. I refuse to let it get the better of me and I am going to Get My Brave Back and deny this strange fear. I am glad for one thing; I am not afraid to examine and eradicate my fear, or at least face it.
Let me add that I do prefer to do the driving, like some kinda control freak (?!)
I might not make a very good goose...

Go West Young Woman

Thats me going to Oregon from Colorado in a Volkswagon with a kitten, puppy, 2 guys and a guitar. The start of a grand adventure. August 1976

June 09, 2011

Half

There was a half moon in the sky last night. That is how I am feeling. Only living at half, only a part turned to the light, the rest in shadows. I do not know why it is like that. There is no one thing preventing me from full mooning.
I have lived rather quietly and for awhile now. Moments of flash here and there, yes. Brilliant stirrings and currents, yes. I am rather near the very end of this cycle I know, I hope...
Ughh. I sure don't mean to sound so glum but today and yesterday have been especially trying. I have many blessing to count, wildly so. I need to reach out and grab a shooting star by the tail. I need to dip my cup in the fountain of abundance. I need to feel the warm sun on my cheek. I need to have a day without worry. I need a fairy godmother, a sugar daddy, a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, a wily puss in boots, a pat on the back and a smile of support.
Wish me luck, please. And thanks for listening. Love all the way around.

I know I know... boo freakin hoo...

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